Shame

Remember this day. As one of the most shameful days of your entire life.

The day when you did something so grotesque, that the dictionary doesn't even include a word to describe the situation.

The day when the displayed behavior is phony. As if nothing happened, though we know better the truth.

The day when you stepped on a human being, mercilessly.

And it's not about what you did. And it's not even about how you did it. But for what.

The day when even the curses died, as, shocked as they were, couldn't find their way to the lips.

The shame that marked your being today is so shining in dark hues, it is so hurtful, and so huge, that it makes me cry.

It makes me cry for who you were and what you became in one single day.

The day when the shame burned your flesh and my soul in one go.

Remember this day. Because it gave you the ugliest scar. And you will walk with it on your forehead for the rest of your life.

Hiding it in plain sight.

The Miracles Doers

We didn't ask them to bring us into this sometimes ugly world. But they did hope the best for us.

We did not always listen to their words and advises. But they kept talking to us even when we did not pay attention.

We forgot to call them or when we did we dispatched them with the speed of an express letter. But they kept waiting eagerly to hear our voice even when our lips were too busy sharing words with strangers.

We disliked their old views and their desire to see us growing like them. But they did not give up on us, when we failed and fell.

We outraged when they commented on our relationships. But they understood when our hearts were broken and they didn't judge us.

We no longer remember to play with them. But they will smile and their eyes will shine if out of the blue we will jump in their bed as we used to do when we were children.

We no longer cry in front of them when we are hurt. But they will know when we do and they will keep their tears hidden and instead they will cook food for us or they will pester us with silly questions.

The frown on our forehead, even when invisible, touches their heart in ways only known and felt by parents.

It is a terrible grumpy, cloudy and rainy day here. I called my dad who is in the hospital, thousands of kilometers away from me, and talked to him. At the end of the conversation, he told me:
"Look, don't worry, I will send you a piece of sun from here. Catch it."

Believe it or not, exactly one minute later the rain stopped, the skies split and a blinding sun poured thousands of warm rays on my window. I guess parents are the Gods of this world and the miracles doers.

Love them more. Now.

Strangers

On tonight #55wordstory theme.

“What a cleavage!“
„What dark eyes!“

“Your round knees make my knees melt!”
“Your restless fingers make me gulp!”

“I wanna lick that drop of sweat!”
“I wanna jump in your lap!”

“Be mine!”
“Take me!”

The two strangers in the train compartment had no idea their thoughts had already started to make passionate love.

The new normal...until it lasts

I wake up, as always, not welcoming the sunshine, but the bitterness in my soul.

You already have breakfast chit-chatting with whoever is around.

I crawl to my coffee machine with an empty look.

You surf the Internet and laugh about the latest posts on Facebook.

I smoke my lungs out, trying to decide if I stare at the walls or do the laundry.

You take a bath and groom yourself.

I move from the living to the bedroom, standing still near the bed.

You turn on your ipod and leave your home.

I keep staying near the empty bad.

You walk with enthusiasm and happiness is flowing from every step you make.

I go to the bathroom to watch myself into the mirror. Too ugly a vision.

You smile and your heart is beating faster.

I come back into the living and check my emails. I wish I could call my mom, but I can't.

You take the train and your smile is even bigger. 

I go into the small kitchen and make myself smaller in a corner on the cold tiles.

You arrive at the destination and your body and soul are in peaceful harmony.

I manage to stand up and search for another corner to hide and find a reason to breath.

Your entire being is now reacting with thrills when seeing the object of your desire.

I finally let out a mute cry that could break all the glass in the world.

You make love and forget about anything.

I repeat the process.

You keep having fun.  

Regrets

This is not about you loving me as much as I love you.
This is not about me giving everything, while you refraining from giving back.
This is not about me fighting with the world, while you waiting for a "fitting" life.
This is not about me crawling from one day to another, while you watching with pity.
This is not about me coming to a dead end, while you choosing among several paths.
This is not about me bleeding for the rest of my life, while you walking smiling.
This is about the small moments you stubbornly refused to give. Not to me. To us.

I shall never be able to arrange the collar of your shirt.
I shall never be able to make you a tea during the cold nights.
I shall never feel your hand helping me to jump over a puddle on a rainy day.
I shall never be able to watch you from the bathroom door, while you are shaving.
I shall never feel the ticking of your heart, while you are taking a nap.
I shall never hear you smacking your lips, while you are eating the food I cooked for you.
I shall never throw the slippers after you for leaving them in the middle of the room.
I shall never see you smiling, while I am doing my funny faces.
I shall never feel the the sand and the waves of the ocean together with you.
I shall never share a chocolate with you.
I shall never run after you because you forgot your earphones.
I shall never steal the remote control just to have your attention.
I shall never be able to buy you a beer on my way home.
I shall never be able to smell your perfume in the morning and roll my eyes with pleasure.
I shall never be able to be by your side, when life sucks.
I shall never have my tears wiped by your fingers.

Regrets that will always live in my heart and will tear me apart.

Scream

This is my take in tonight #55wordstory project initiated by @vivekisms some time ago and presented by me in a previous post. Enjoy and judge it. :D


Tongue felt cold and hot in the same time.

Lips were shining oily with sweetness.

Throat was singing with moans of pleasure.

Suddenly the buttery cornucopia got smaller.

Greed had just emptied it.

Last drops were slowly sliding down the valley.

I screamed.

My dress had been ice-creamed.

Have you been X-Filed yet?

Why would anybody in 2012 would write about a TV series that started to be broadcasted in 1993 and finished 10 years ago? Maybe because in the last episode the most awesome villain in a TV series, The Smoking Man, speaks about 22nd December 2012 as being the start of alien colonization? Or maybe because all the other TV shows and even movies made after that year got their inspiration from this pool of magnificent topics episode after episode?

I have re-watched lately in a slow rhythm all 9 seasons and though in the market there are other productions with super technology involved, I must say, X-Files has no similar counterpart. Its unique atmosphere and the background red thread story (the mother of the mothers of conspiracies) still resists the test of time. I am writing this post for Fringe fans for example, for Eureka fans, for Matrix fans, for the young generations who have no clue who Scully and Mulder are.

I don't believe that there is an untouched weird, bizarre or paranormal subject out there not being depicted by this series. You can find everything in it: alien abductions, brainwashing, shape-shifters, man-beasts, lake monsters,  ghosts, spirits, artificial intelligence, clones, wicked kids, pyrokinetics, lycantrophy, serial killers, reincarnation, subliminal messages, killer bugs, spontaneous combustion, fetishists (oh boy, Donnie Pfaster is one of the creepiest psychos ever. :D :D), voodoo, horse men, alligator men, Navajo codes, hackers (the Lone Gunmen are the first true geeks in the history of TV, amazing and delightful guys), religious killings, the butterfly effect, men without mouths and eyes (no, this was not a Matrix invention, sorry), genetic mutants...you name it!

And though it is quite difficult to choose from so much epicness in one place, here are my all time favorite episodes.
-Irresistible (season 2) - starring the above mentioned fetishist (painted nails and cut fingers came from X-Files dearest Dexter fans).  
-Musings of a Cigarette Smoking Man (season 4) - wanna know who killed JFK? :)
-Never Again (season 4) - where you meet the sexiest speaking tattoo. Voice-Jodie Foster. Enough said.
-Small Potatoes (season 4) - the dream of any man. :D
-Unusual Suspects (season 5) - when we finally find out how Mulder met the Lone Gunmen in 1989; priceless tech fairy, with pre-historical computers and stuff. :D
-The Post Modern Prometheus (season 5) - the most sensible episode of all; when we see who the real monsters are and where Cher plays an important part of the story. :)
-Chinga (season 5) - with a creepy doll. "I want to play" will haunt you many days after watching it. No wonder. Stephen King wrote the script. :D
-Bad Blood (season 5) - about vampires. 50 minutes of non-stop laughing.
-Triangle (season 6) - shot in Hitchcock style, it is a jewel. I would add time travel, second world war, and Bermuda Triangle.
-How The Ghosts Stole Christmas (season 6) - a haunted house on Christmas night, only 4 characters. Stairs that disappear, opening doors and getting into the same room, over and over again. You got the idea. :)
-Arcadia (season 6) - for the fun of seeing Mulder and Scully impersonating a married couple.
-Orison (season 7) - because the nail fetishist is back. :D

If you are a fan of the X-Files, please drop me a line and tell me what is your favorite episode. I would really love to find out what actually ticked for other people. Thanks a lot for reading. :)